Born to be good

Lynne McTaggart

“What makes Iago evil?” Joan Didion asks, opening her novel Play it As it Lays.
The more interesting question, to my mind, is what makes Desdemona – or indeed anyone — good?
Every story that we are told ingrains in us the idea that we were born to be selfish.  Left to our own devices, without the taming influence of a religion or social contract, we would act according to our true natures, which is to say meanly cold-bloodedly and entirely for self-preservation.
As the philosopher Thomas Hobbes once put it, altruism is an illusion; anyone appearing to act unselfishly did so simply ‘to deliver his mind from the pain of compassion.’ According to this mindset, we do nice things, basically, out of guilt; a kindness is essentially hypocrisy.
Altruism and evolution
I’ve been thinking about this after reading about an eccentric American scientist called George Price, who became obsessed with the origins of kindness.  He could not square altruism with biology – specifically evolution as it was understood at the time.
As he thought about it, altruism was completely at odds with Charles Darwin’s notion of survival of the fittest.  Acting unselfishly out of a concern for the needs or interests of others, regardless of the personal consequences, is potentially deleterious to the self; in fact, helping another in a tight spot can also reduce your possibility of survival. 
Altruism, one could argue, is ultimately an act of purposeful self-destruction. In a zero sum game, it is deliberately choosing the shorter straw. 
Game theory
To answer this question, Price moved to London and sought out the evolutionary biologist W. D. Hamilton.  Together they worked out a mathematical equation for altruism, using game theory to work out how altruism aids evolution.
Their theory explains altruistic behavior from the perspective of the gene and its need to replicate. The gene that promotes the desire to help other family members aids its own replication because it will help the spread of individuals bearing copies of that gene. In other words, birds will feed the young of relatives in order to increase the number of their shared genes in future generation.
The other face of this theory is the ‘helper’ idea –that an animal that offers itself as a helper increases its own chances of survival and future reproduction or ensures the survival of the family. For instance, the white-fronted African bee eater will fight snakes and other predators, forage for food for its relatives and put off having its own young to help its close relatives raise their own young. Helping is also a means of propagating the gene.
A variation on this idea is ‘group selection’ or group adaptation, or operating on behalf of the group’s gene pool.  This is thought to occur because most of the members of the group, as with bees, are ultimately related to the queen. All of the worker bees are deliberately sterile and forfeit their reproductive fitness because the bees within any particular colony are mostly relatives of each other and so are simply hardwired by a biological evolutionary imperative – to ensure that queen survives in order to pass on their genes. 
Finally, there is the ‘I’ll-scratch-your-back theory’:  a chimp will groom another chimp only because he’s fully expecting reciprocity. Richard Dawkins even offers a 'cost-benefit' equation that calculates the point at which it becomes genetically advantageous for an animal to display altruism.
Random acts of kindness
The ultimate problem with the theory is the vast number of exceptions to the rule.  Extensive studies of animals offer countless instances where animals are capable of random acts of extraordinary self-sacrifice, compassion, courage and generosity toward members of their own species, members of other species and even toward humans, often to their own detriment.
Many species of animals employ alarm and information systems about danger and food, even when this would endanger them.  Ververt monkeys use alarm calls to warn other monkeys of impending attack, even though raising the alarm could increase their own chances of being harmed.
Animals also routinely evidence moments in which they put aside the most fundamental drive of all: the need to eat. In innumerable instances, animals have shared food or ensured that weaker individuals in a pack or herd be fed, even if it means giving up their own food. This occurs even in species like red foxes, known for jealously guarding of their own catch.
Animals have been known to protect and share food with the injured or less successful in a pack – again, in situations where they themselves may face harm. In one instance Tatu, a mongoose, whose paw had been injured in a fight was unable to fight. The other mongooses in her pack began foraging close to her, so that she'd have more food and even gave up some of their daily food to her.
The Dawkins'-eye view of the universe would argue that altruism is impossible among animals that are not closely related as it runs counter to survival. This reductive argument also falls down in the face of many examples that describe assistance and cooperation by unrelated animals for no apparent self-serving purpose.
Friendly chimps
It is now possible to argue otherwise now, thanks to technology that can analyze fecal samples and from the DNA determine which animals are related to each other. This technology served a recent German-American field project of primatologists in Kibale National Park in Uganda studying the social relations of entire colony of chimpanzees. 
From an exhausting and messy analysis of the excrement gathered in the chimp’s grounds as they went about their days, the scientists were able to determine that although chimps spend more time with their relatives, they also are highly cooperative among those with whom they lack any sort of genetic kinship.  Kevin Langergraber and his colleagues concluded that ‘males in the majority of highly affiliative and cooperative dyads are unrelated or distantly related.’ And this is among highly competitive chimps.
Explaining altruism requires acknowledging a quality in living things that drives stake into the very heart of biology as we know it.  It’s more likely that we weren’t born to be selfish at all, but born to be good. 
Maybe it selfishness is the real pathology — bred into people who grow up in a pathological environment — and goodness is hardwired and abandoned out of cultural necessity in our eat-or-be-eaten society.
If this is true, we need another view of how evolution works.
We see this at its purest with animals.  An animal acts as it must,without a new set of cultural rationalizations (such as our most recent one: greed is good).  They help to remind us who we really are.

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Lynne McTaggart

Lynne McTaggart is an award-winning journalist and the author of seven books, including the worldwide international bestsellers The Power of Eight, The Field, The Intention Experiment and The Bond, all considered seminal books of the New Science and now translated into some 30 languages.

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1,308 comments on “Born to be good”

  1. I agree, humans are inherently good once the fear is gone; fear which has become more widespread thanks to the systems we are all live under and have done for thousands of years.
    We are not born in sin (as many religions insist we are), the sins of others are thrust upon us, mostly the sins of those wielding power and as you say, as a result the world mostly operates from the fight or flight for survival mode.
    I would love to wave a magic wand and remove all the fear from the planet. Ah, then we will see the world and ourselves as we truly are - beautiful.

  2. That co-operation, kindness and even altruism are common without genetic similarity does not invalidate the evolutionary explanation. It is a truism that a gene which inclines us to do things which increase the chances of that gene's survival is more likely to survive. If it also encourages us to do those things in circumstances that do not enhance its survival, that isn't a show-stopper. Unless altruism resulted in so many deaths that the bearers of the "altruism gene" died out, there is no evolutionary problem in random acts of kindness. The same instincts that make us find babies cute also make us find puppies cute.
    Genes aren't selfish; people are selfish.

  3. Open up and you will see
    Hey, that other is really me.
    Jump off that selfish lineair track
    Warm up, Spread out, Welcome back!

  4. I feel blessed living in Toronto, the biggest city in Canada. Daily I bear witness to the kindness of strangers.
    Be it from holding a door open, giving directions, providing comfort to total strangers, or throwing themselves into heart wrenching or life threatening situations.
    When life is sprung upon us our deep compassion and kindness naturally bursts forth. Gushing with the underlying wisdom that we all are connected as one.

  5. Greetings!
    By forgiving you, I forgive myself.
    By loving you, I love myself.
    To save my life, I have to give it to you.
    Such is duality...
    A mind free of guilt does not experience such paradoxes, for it sees all as equal, only one power, love, good, God, Universe.
    All things are created and become manifest for the process of evolution.
    Currently, we are experiencing a revolution of the mind.
    Wake up, The Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!
    Peace be with you,

  6. This article is so interesting. When I read about chimps, with their close relationship to humans and the amount of time we study them, I wondered, what about the opposite? How is it that humans are sometimes bullies? Are there bullies in animal society too? Just curious.

  7. I was surprised where this article went to. I anticipated a more non-partisan view of kindness or goodness.
    I honestly believe that we have independent four-dimensional views of our world that may or may not include others.
    Whether I want a new Hummer, world peace, clean water, or international travel is all a personal desire of which others' interests are but participatory in their own desires.
    Kindness and goodness happens in the field of desire as a result of the desire. In the history of humanity there have been a lot rituals that are very brutal that are mean for the overall kindness of the tribe or the individual, but harsh nonetheless.
    I do not think me kind if I say something nice to someone just to be nice. I would rather say what I have to say so that i stay strong in the field of my interaction with them.
    I appreciate this topic Lynne and included it on my Facebook page today. I have much more to say about this particular subject.
    Thanks as always
    Frank Dobner

  8. Trying to understand humans from an animal point of view has always been an insult to the spirit, and the human spirit is the only thing that keeps humanity alive.

  9. This is a rocking blog piece Lynne - thank you thank you. I'm with Suzzane and kindly Ian rather than others who look to religious beliefs like original sin or Darwinism - yes scientists can also be as religious as a crusader when it comes to protecting their position of power.... and by now we all know what the crusaders got up to in the name of Jesus (the one who introduced the world to Love) - don't we?
    Thanks to people like Lynne and Lipton and countless scientists and spiritual leaders from religions all over - there is an epoch dawning for which our minds are expanding enough to be able to take in (or on) a hundred rather than one or another belief driven model.
    Even as a child I would hear my scientist father and thoroughly instinctive mother AND all their friends argue between nature and nurture. They were both right as is Darwin and Dawkin, as is Sheldrake and Lipton - the list is long.
    Meantime love & kindness feels good and the other "meanly cold-bloodedly and entirely for self-preservation" does not. If you don't believe me just look at the faces on TV of the kindness dudes and then try and find a spark of joy in the eye of the cold blooded meanies from either camp.
    Natural humans - and animals love to feel good. And the ones who simply can't from within are unnatural to insane poor things. They too can be taught one day and until then best give them the swerve.
    Thanks again Lynne - you've put a spring in my step.

  10. For the other view/theory of evolution that promotes cooperation read :
    'Spontaneos Evolution' by Bruce Lipton & Steve Bhaerman. The un-manipulated, non-political version of evolution.

  11. We are all connected--animal and human. We are all linked through our DNA, contrary to religious/creationism ideology. Do not be insulted by the idea that understanding of human behavior may have a link to animal behavior. It goes far beyond human spirit--into our beingness of all that exists throughout the Universe.
    I firmly believe we are directly linked to dolphins and other marine life--and we have yet to discovery our true natures. Altruism occurs throughout all species, and our understanding of this is vital to survival of all beings.
    What we see in some areas of humans, the violence, the lack of compassion, the lack of respect and acceptance; is due to ideology based in certain religions. I raised my son in a non-religious home,teaching by example of compassion, non-violence, kindness and acceptance; and he has an accepting, compassionate nature and very well balanced. He was also given healthy choices--shown different religious group experiences in a positive and healthy manner, and allowed to choose his own beliefs. I was told over and over how incorrect I was in his upbringing, however they were proven wrong. By his own choice, he is Secular Humanist, and sees the true nature of those that tout religion. Examples were set by those he knew who were Christan, and he made his own highly educated choices to believe in rational and logical thought.
    I do believe religion mars the altruistic nature of humans, as it is shown throughout mankind's journey; creating dysfunctional behavior in the name of their G-d.

  12. The thing that causes confusion on this issue is that people and scientists in particular need to see that evolution itself has evolved and is still evolving. At the most basic levels of life survival of the individual is all important. From there it has evolved to family, tribe, town and finally nations, religions and races.
    The latest steps in this chain are in the realm of ideas and ultimately to spiritual enlightenment. Of course at any given time there are individuals in any group who are ahead or behind the pack which explains the issues raised above, but we are and have always been on the same path.

  13. I agree with Skip Press' comment that comparing us with animals ignores the unique human spirit. Love is our nature unless it has been destroyed early on, which it often is. One neglected, abused child can wreak terrible damage on us all, because we are all part of one social body. Taking care of the hurt pinkie on one hand is not altruism or sacrifice.
    Lynn, I've read your books and love your work (and discussed it in my new book, The Healer Is You), but when it comes to love and altruism animal studies aren't relevant, even though sometimes they behave better than we do, because their instincts aren't as likely to be destroyed.

  14. Hello. Thank you Lynne.
    I have done a lot of research and experiments with compassion, love and good.
    We are of Mind and the information it creates and organizes (consciousness). We choose to create compassion, enhancing love, which grows well-being and its correlates of everything good like freedom, nonviolence, peace, happiness, health, and longevity.
    Compassion and force are reciprocal antagonists. Creating compassion (good) adds love at the expense of force. Initiating force (bad) against others is about dominence, not compassion.
    It’s as if the Universe wants more love and we are its love-generators. Art got it right.: Evolution is about love.
    Here’s a 20-minute video about this,

  15. Good Morning All,
    May the Truth set us free
    I am an expression of my Mother and Father's Heart's desire....We were created in love, should live in love, and walk the path of love. As you wish to be treated, so should you treat all others. Unconditionality should be the name of the game. When we expect good from others....that is what we will receive. We are magnetically attractive beings and our Soul Song is sung everyday when we open our mouths and hearts.
    Blessings to all and have a wonderful day!

  16. Its no secret or wonder that many indigenous societies view modern western societies as being sick. An interesting read for you guys might be 'A Return to Laughter' (sorry I read it in college and forget the author and particulars). It is an anthropological novel based on real events about a tribe in Africa which gets stricken by a plague. The anthropologist/heroine sees the strong communal structure of the tribe degenerate into a literal witch hunt with friends and family members accusing each other of using witchcraft. The scene should be familiar to those who have studied the witch crazes in Europe and America, or McCarthyism for that matter.
    My point is while many will say that these stressful conditions reveal the real people, I would argue that stress is a pathogen, much like any other virus. When a certain stress level is reached, our 'moral immune systems' can no longer take the load and the sickness erupts as the sort of Darwinian nightmare we see or read about on a daily basis. It would also explain westerners higher susceptibility to this sort of destructive behavior. Indigenous cultures certainly go through great stresses but such a stress e.g. a famine, is temporary and is counterbalanced by their understanding and acceptance of natural cycles. The constant low level of stress loaded on us in the west is both responsible for (in part) and analogous to degenerative conditions like chronic fatigue which eventual pushes the immune system to breaking point through its constancy.

  17. For me , it`s a very simple premise that Lynne expounds : species are here today and gone tomorrow . For instance , the dinosaurs were around for 150 million years before some of them evolved over the last 65 million years into today's birds of the air . The biosphere of our planet is a single , complex and living entity . our species is fairly new , a few millions of years .
    What I`m saying is that it is the life force that is the salient power of creation , it always has been . Species adapt and are molded by the planet to take optimum advantage of the current
    conditions on the planet : weather , temperature , ete ete . We are all manifestations of this " singular " blanket of life on ,within and in the atmosphere of the world . Life reaches out to life , We recognise the same animating force in all of us ; we are all related and interdependent .
    Bear , pig , lion , bird , bacteria , virus - all facets of the same organism .

  18. Dr David Hamilton's book "Why Kindness is Good for You" (published by Hay House) explains how it has been scientifically proven that 'kindness changes the brain, impacts the heart and immune system, and may even be an antidote to depression'. Well worth reading.
    His website is

  19. Lynne,
    I find it so interesting that all of this research on animals is used as some kind of proof of something which we don’t understand because we don’t believe it’s natural to be “good”.
    Our opinion of evolution is still largely based on Darwin’s theory of the “survival of the fittest”.
    Modern language has a different use of the adjective “fittest” due to the physical ‘fitness’ industry, but in Darwin’s time, the word meant more how well did the organism “fit in” with the environment.
    So it’s not that the “strongest” will always win the game...just consider the dinosaurs...but the most “adaptable” will win the game, and sometimes the best way to adapt is to act altruistically!
    Why is it so difficult for us to understand there is a natural positive flow of positivity in our world...we just have to tap into comes naturally without a doubt.
    Our gene’s seem to be aware of this, so why aren’t we?
    Reach out and scratch someone’s back and you create an opportunity for some back-scratching to come your way...just like the story of the natives you wrote about in a previous post whereby they give away a fish and expect that gift to actually bring more value to their lives.
    I’ve lived the bulk of my life questioning the natural goodness in life...I’ve now learned to recognize that goodness and I’m wallowing in the awareness...
    Write On!

  20. I have recently been reading an old edition of a book by one of my heroes Carl Rogers titled: On Becoming A Person, Houghton Mifflin, 1961. In it Rogers talks about how clients who are shown unconditional positive regard can allow themselves to become open to their deepest depths where there is a sense of self that is totally without hate. In one client's own words: "I found it by going deep within myself. It seems to be something that is the essence, that lasts." Having gone to that depth myself, I know that is the core of what we all are. Namaste

  21. The BIG questions that have NOT been asked yet are: "How do we return to love? What is the practical means and ways to spread altruism? How do we get people to cooperate rather than compete in a capitalistic society? How do we create a tipping for a compassionate society?"

  22. Dr. David R. Hawkins has written 8 books about the Science of Consciousness. Ego is the problem--- Connecting with the zero point of non-duality= Spiritual Consciousness/the state of Enlightenment is the solution.. He calibrates levels of consciousness -human and animal in these books.. Rose's comments are similar to "A Course In Miracles" which leads to the consciousness of Heaven. Jan's comments appropriate.

  23. Hello.
    I like to think we live in our mind-bodies, as part of something greater, but free to explore through our individual senses and thoughts, then integrating our learning with the Whole, Universe.
    Now, I like to think our learning of the Universe is about creating It, perhaps co-creating with every one and every thing, God.
    Re John Wong’s questions? They are BIG questions, John. I would be honored to offer my thoughts.
    “How do we return to love?” We live in the already growing context of Love with every one and every thing (See Pinker in KC above). We choose to create compassion because of its incentives; join in the growing of love for its benefits, then receiving as rewards its greater well-being like freedom, happiness, health, peace, prosperity, and longevity. Returning to love is when we create more compassion, new and incremental love.
    “What is the practical means and ways to spread altruism?” The issue is communicating with and caring for (compassion) living systems, -ours and others. The research indicates our motivation of altruism or selfishness does not matter. The Universe just wants more compassion, incremental love. Though, when we help others, the self gets more than if we help the self, alone. This means the issue is not about the difference of a person in church praying to create healing for another or a person in business creating a product or service as a symbol through which to pass along his/her compassion to the masses. In addition, it makes no difference whether I start my business with my savings or yours. Savings can be used as capital or borrowings; you deserve a return on your money if you risk it by helping me, and I do not mind paying you something for the risk. Altruism, selfishness, capitalism, and profit are just words. When used between you and me they might be good, when we use them to judge, demonize, and exclude others, as the political class and its supporters do, the words are not about creating compassion, love, well-being, and good.
    “How do we get people to cooperate rather than compete in a capitalistic society?” When an individual creates communication and care for living systems, it is usually for self-healing. Self-healing is cooperation, trillions of times a day in just one mind-body. It happens ongoing, subconsciously, and without the individual knowing. When we create communication and care for another’s living systems it contributes and cooperates with healing to them and when they do it for us it cooperates with our healing. We cooperate with others all the time, usually less as we go out of our concentric circles. Since the Age of Enlightenment, our compassion, love and well-being have increased at a greater rate. The free enterprise of one wanting to help another explains much of our compassion’s growth. To most of us, capitalism and competition are words that describe an economic form of creativity in helping others, sometimes successful and sometimes not, but rarely involving force to dominate others, taking what’s theirs without their consent.
    “How do we create a tipping for a compassionate society?” It’s happening on an individual basis, within, one convert at a time, as we decide to live by compassion and without force. It has been growing from the beginning of humanity, and it started growing much faster in the Age of Enlightenment. Currently, I can’t tell if the growth of compassion has speeded up or slowed down, but to Art’s question, starting this thread, “evolution,” “…does it work by love?” I answer, yes, and the tipping of individuals away from force, “for a compassionate society,” is the evolution of love.
    Now, I like to think the subject of our learning, the objective of our creativity, has evolved to Compassion without Force. Intending compassion excludes force, intending force excludes compassion. It’s always our choice. What kind of person do we want to be? What do we want to contribute to our kids, grandkids, neighborhood, and society.
    I wish you compassion, more love, and greater well-being. Thank you.
    KC Blair

  24. For the last fifty seven years I felt that I was missing important information into the why’s and how’s about life. I am now 60 years old and it has only been in the last few years that I have come to know through experience that we (humanity) are eternal, expanding, evolving beings always looking for the improvement. After all, any other way points to an end. So from that prespective we are at our very core selfish.
    Through many personal experiences both on the job as well as in nature I have come to know that I create my life’s events through my thoughts. I have come to know that what I give my attention to long enough will manifest into my life whether it is wanted or unwanted. So it is important to know that there is no such thing as no. In other words, this universe is attraction based and you get what you predominately think about. As you replace unwanted thoughts with ones that are wanted you can then label yourself a “deliberate creator”. Sorting through the endless stream of thoughts that we all have is an impossible task until you learn to “FEEL” each thought. The thoughts that feel good are the ones you want more of and the ones that give you that donut in the pit of your stomach are the ones you want to let go of or at least think of something that brings some relief. This “feeling” we get is our direct connection to our inner-being, our higher self. This connection provides everyone with all the guidance we will ever need to succeed in this world. I know this is a very bold statement but I believe it to be true and I use it to guide me through my days.
    Each and every one of us is creating our own life experience with no outside influences unless we choose to focus on them. We are not passive by standers, we are the main event. This broader point of view is life altering to say the least.
    It’s time we give up on the concept that some one will come up with a set of rules that all six billion people on this planet will be happy with. It’s time to stop putting a label on everyone and everything, like good, bad, selfish, materialistic etc and come to grips with fact that all things are what they are. It’s time to awaken to the fact that we are Source energy in physical form.
    Lynne, I read all your books and I am looking forward to your next one. It’s people like you that will gently nudge humanity into the understanding that all things are ONE. Our time has come.

  25. I just finished reading a book - The Purposeful Universe - by Carl Calleman. A wonderful journey through physics and biological evolution that articulates beautifully a post Darwinian paradigm of evolution.

  26. Dear Lynne,
    Its great to learn from your post that animals do have altruistic qualities. But in human society I don't believe that selfishness alone hinders the inherent altruistic qualities. The cultural values and other specific external environmental reasons influence in depleting this godly qualities

  27. Something is shifting. Something is changing in the world - somehow we need to bridge the gulf between science and religion, broader, emerging spirituality and traditional (ostensibly divisive) religious groups. Prayer and meditation, targeted thought, intention - they are all the same... People like Lynne are beginning to really change the way we think, the world thinks and, critically, opening the younger generation to new ideas and new hope that they may actually have the power to change the world. Science - religion - spirituality - intention - let's enmesh? Perhaps? Not sure if I dare use the love word....

  28. I haven't read all the comments, but once again Bruce Liptons research comes handy for this topic.... What if genes had almost nothing to do with the survival of any species? What if the common knowing (i.e. my Point of View is that everything learnt by this species can be shared if you are open for it, that is psychic and can receive information from for instance the Zero point field) among a species is the one thing that make you choose from what is rewarding instead of from what a single individual would choose??

  29. Couple of things come to mind as I read all this:
    1) We're mammals, and dependent on others for our survival for a large duration of our life. We're social creatures, and we fear being rejected by the group. It is possible to survive by taking from others and people (and corporations) do, but you have to break through a pain/fear barrier as other people will only support you when it's in their best interest once you take that step. I guess what I'm saying here is that it is reciprocal.
    2) With the advent of humanity as the dominant species on the world, other species are dying out left, right & centre, the only creatures consistently evolving and gaining ground are diseases and viruses, designed to feed off of humans.
    3) - My personal opinion is that it is each of our responsibility to promote the kind of world we wish to live in. This is more than just doing unto others as you would have them do unto you, it is living true to your values, and enabling others to do so.
    -It's the systems we currently have in place which are systematically shaping the dominant values within out behaviour - if you don't like things in this world, help change the systems.

  30. Good morning everyone, I love this site, and all of you. May I have the courage to be available in my life to change my core values so everyone may benefit, and live simply..... Thank you.

  31. A soul must first become 'self-concious' and the descent into materiality (incarnation) is part of that process. In seeing itself as totally seperate, the soul will initially be selfish. The process of living through many incarnations and the suffering which is inevitably a part of each life will bring about an empathy in the soul for all other living things. When that happens, the soul will see itself as linked to all Creation and will have become 'God-concious'. This is more a process of the mind in the heart than the mind in the head.
    Animals have less freewill than humans but I suspect that the same process occurs, perhaps on a lower part of the evoluionary spiral

  32. Hi ,
    Lets take less importance to the deep evolution theories of species because remeber, we are not our bodies, the body is just a vehicle plenty of imperfections like the cars we drive. we are the love we share to one another: nothing less ¡¡

  33. dear lynn,
    what do you think will happen to the animal world -- if they had the pressing need to protect in a ego driven and unethical manner --
    " our RELIGION"
    " our WAY OF LIFE"
    see, there are NO sick and bizzare inquisitions in the animal world --
    no animal corners all the food for itself , in the forest-- they just have their fill and move away , so that a lesser animal can feed on the remains--

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